I have always, always, always vowed that I would stay home with my babies for at least their first year or so. I swore up and down and i could never understand what the point was to have a baby then to stick it in daycare for someone else to enjoy and influence for 50% of their day. And now here I am, working 40 hours a week and commuting. So now I can gladly offer my 2 cents about this very hot topic that so many women feel inclined to ramble on and on about. Unfortunately, most of the opinions expressed out there seem to be so black and white and one team being so very critical and cruel to the other. So for once in my life, something is actually not so black and white for me. Just a lovely shade of gray.
I stayed home with Julianne for the first three years of her life. I remember when I was pregnant and asked if I was going to work after she came, I was always honest and said I really did not know because I did not know how I would feel and bond with my baby. Of course once she was here I could barely tear myself away long enough to even pee! So what was so wonderful about being at home? Everything. Running errands, making dinner, keeping my home clean and organized, taking her to dance, lil' gym, Mornings with Jesus, story time at the library, Sea World in the middle of the week, swimming every day, volunteering. I often heard Working Moms say they could not be a SAHM cuz they would be so bored but there is no time to be bored! There are so many things to do and show your baby. Being a SAHM is a full-time, exhausting, productive, satisfying job. I proudly put it on my resume. Financially it was difficult surviving off one income. Those were a few years of balance transfers and cash advances to make ends meet. It wasn't easy but it wasn't hard.
So now I have Tyler. We tried our darnest to arrange our lives so that I could stay home with him. I cried and I cried knowing I would have to put him in daycare. 1/4 of our income goes toward childcare between him and J and this time, balance transfers just weren't gonna cut it. I sulked one last time then just accepted that it is what it is. I prayed to God that my baby would be safe and our bond would be protected and almost as if to send me a sign that he was listening, Big T got a spot at Stepping Stone at Brackenridge. Two steps away from daddy's work and only two blocks away from mine. So now here we are. Mom and Dad work, commute, and T goes to daycare. He is in a sweet little room with the nicest and most responsible ladies that adore him just like his real Tia does. He is calm and friendly. He is not neglected. He does not sit in front of a TV all day or lay in his crib all lonely. He is not surrounded by dozens of snot-nosed kids and germs. He is fine. He is fine and happy and very very loved. So what is so wonderful about being a Working Mommy? I get to take a shower and put on nice clothes every day. I get to talk to other adults instead of just baby (or doggie) talk all day. I get to surf the web instead of watch Baby Einstein. I get to potty without a kid in my arms. Tyler gets to socialize and grow and learn. Being a working mommy is exhausting, productive, and very satisfying. Managing my time is very difficult but I am getting the hang of it. Asking for help and receiving it from my wonderful husband is helpful. It really isn't easy but its not all that hard.
So now I have experienced both worlds and I have a new found respect for both. I still wish all mommies could stay home with their babies just because there is no better love than a mother's. If you can afford it, do it. If you cant, its ok too. To all of you that think this is black and white should think about it at a different level.... we are all mothers that love our children. Instead of focusing on which CHOICE is a better one, why not support each other for what ever choice we have made and encourage each other to just do the very best we can.
I stayed home with Julianne for the first three years of her life. I remember when I was pregnant and asked if I was going to work after she came, I was always honest and said I really did not know because I did not know how I would feel and bond with my baby. Of course once she was here I could barely tear myself away long enough to even pee! So what was so wonderful about being at home? Everything. Running errands, making dinner, keeping my home clean and organized, taking her to dance, lil' gym, Mornings with Jesus, story time at the library, Sea World in the middle of the week, swimming every day, volunteering. I often heard Working Moms say they could not be a SAHM cuz they would be so bored but there is no time to be bored! There are so many things to do and show your baby. Being a SAHM is a full-time, exhausting, productive, satisfying job. I proudly put it on my resume. Financially it was difficult surviving off one income. Those were a few years of balance transfers and cash advances to make ends meet. It wasn't easy but it wasn't hard.
So now I have Tyler. We tried our darnest to arrange our lives so that I could stay home with him. I cried and I cried knowing I would have to put him in daycare. 1/4 of our income goes toward childcare between him and J and this time, balance transfers just weren't gonna cut it. I sulked one last time then just accepted that it is what it is. I prayed to God that my baby would be safe and our bond would be protected and almost as if to send me a sign that he was listening, Big T got a spot at Stepping Stone at Brackenridge. Two steps away from daddy's work and only two blocks away from mine. So now here we are. Mom and Dad work, commute, and T goes to daycare. He is in a sweet little room with the nicest and most responsible ladies that adore him just like his real Tia does. He is calm and friendly. He is not neglected. He does not sit in front of a TV all day or lay in his crib all lonely. He is not surrounded by dozens of snot-nosed kids and germs. He is fine. He is fine and happy and very very loved. So what is so wonderful about being a Working Mommy? I get to take a shower and put on nice clothes every day. I get to talk to other adults instead of just baby (or doggie) talk all day. I get to surf the web instead of watch Baby Einstein. I get to potty without a kid in my arms. Tyler gets to socialize and grow and learn. Being a working mommy is exhausting, productive, and very satisfying. Managing my time is very difficult but I am getting the hang of it. Asking for help and receiving it from my wonderful husband is helpful. It really isn't easy but its not all that hard.
So now I have experienced both worlds and I have a new found respect for both. I still wish all mommies could stay home with their babies just because there is no better love than a mother's. If you can afford it, do it. If you cant, its ok too. To all of you that think this is black and white should think about it at a different level.... we are all mothers that love our children. Instead of focusing on which CHOICE is a better one, why not support each other for what ever choice we have made and encourage each other to just do the very best we can.
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