I wish I was a man

so...

I wouldn't care that I don't look like I did at 21 anymore
my gray hairs would make me 'distinguished'
these zits wouldn't be THAT big a deal
that foreplay wouldn't be necessary
that I could get ready in ten minutes instead of 45 in the morning
that I wouldn't have to put on my makeup, pluck my eyebrows, and curl my hair while I drive
I wouldn't have to wear SPANKS
all I'd have to worry about is bringing home a paycheck and taking care of the lawn
that I wouldn't have to keep five to do lists to remember everything I need to get done
I was good at sound affects and video games
I wouldn't have to wake up in the middle of the night to nurse a baby
that I wouldn't notice how dusty the furniture is or how dirty the house is sometimes
I didn't care about what my body looks like after two babies
I could just shave my head instead of 'do my hair'
I would only have to worry about shaving 1 place on my body instead of 3
I could be oblivious to the little things
my clothes was just clothes and not 'outfits'
that I wouldn't be feeling the PAIN from the war going on in my ovaries the last few months
that I wouldn't have to remember to take a pill every day
so my muffin top and saddle bags would go unnoticed